It felt real. I swear it felt real.

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The time has come to deeply think of what you really want to happen in the future.

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Hindi naman ako malungkot. Di rin naman masaya. Yung sakto lang. As in yung saktong sakto lang. Di ko alam kung wala ba akong maramdaman o pinili kong walang maramdaman..

Minsan naiisip ko kung kaya lang ba ako nagho-hold on sa isang bagay kasi takot ako mapagisa.. Takot akong maiwan. Takot akong tahakin yung bukas na ako lang. Nakakatawang isipin na ang yabang kong magsabi na I’m a strong independent woman pero ang totoo nyan, part of me naka dependent sa ibang tao.

What if… subukan ko naman mapagisa? Yung mapapatunayan ko na kaya ko naman pala on my own? Pero what if…it is a bad choice to do?

I want to be better. Physically, spiritually, mentally, emotionally… Lahat. I know I’m doing good pero pakiramdam ko parang may kulang. Hindi ko kasi maramdaman yung self satisfaction na tinatawag.

And I don’t even know where to start. Siguro I have to let go the things that keeps me from growing up?

It’s been a while, wordpress!!! The reason why it took me a while to write something is because…. I simply can’t possibly open my account due to circumstances that I changed my number and since I activated a two-authentication. But a human with a fighting heart won’t give up that easily so whenever I got a chance to go home in province, I spare some time to find my old number just so I can open my gooddamn blog.

And my heart is happy because after months of searching, I finally did it!

I have a lot of stories to tell – of how stress at my work turns to be an enjoyment; of how I was about to give up on love; of how I want to take advancement in my career by taking a master’s degree; of how I deal of loneliness in this big city…

I have a lot of stories that I’ve been keeping for so long now and I want to form those into writings..